Some nights stay with you because they were magical. Others stay with you because they completely fell apart.
One Halloween, I found myself chasing after my drunk ex boyfriend while trying to make sense of an argument that seemed to grow bigger by the minute. At the same time, I watched one of my closest friends drink until he was barely himself, and somewhere in the middle of all of it, everyone seemed to be fighting with everyone else.
It was supposed to be a fun night. We had costumes, plans, and every reason to believe we'd look back on it as one of those great memories. Instead, I mostly remember feeling exhausted, frustrated, and wondering why I was spending so much energy trying to hold everything together.
For a long time, I looked back on that night as a complete disaster. But as I've gotten older, I realize it taught me something important. The people you surround yourself with have a huge impact on the kind of memories you create. Chaos has a way of becoming normal when you're surrounded by it.
At the same time, I've also learned not to let someone else's choices steal an entire evening. Looking back, there were probably still moments I could have laughed at or enjoyed if I hadn't spent so much time trying to fix everyone else's problems.
Sometimes the best thing you can do is step back and let people make their own decisions. You aren't responsible for managing someone else's emotions, and you certainly aren't responsible for saving every night from falling apart.
These days, I'm much more intentional about who I spend my time with. Life is too short to constantly clean up other people's messes when you could be making memories with people who bring out the best in you.